Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
