I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Randomize
