just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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