dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
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