ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
