Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(252): View more from North Carolina

We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?

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(206): View more from Washington

On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...

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(480): View more from Arizona

I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.

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(517): View more from Michigan

He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls

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(705): View more from Ontario

From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute

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(614): View more from Ohio

I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'

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(613): View more from Ontario

he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.

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(985): View more from Louisiana

Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?

(504): View more from Louisiana

Yes. Its here..

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