So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
jump out the window naked night went bad
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