party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
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