Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
im holly from the hills drunk
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
