it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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