The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Randomize
