I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
