I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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