They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize