I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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