I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
My nipple is on Facebook.
Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
