Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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