Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
