i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
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