It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
Randomize
