It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm way too hungover for life right now
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
