I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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