love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Randomize
