I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
Randomize