Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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