matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
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