At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Were you really trying to feed me potato chips while I was sitting on the toilet?
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Randomize
