After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Naked. naked and bneed help.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
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