I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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