Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize