I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize