I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I don't deserve a penis
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
