Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
