I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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