I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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