I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
