I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
