too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
try to milk me bitch
Randomize