We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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