Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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