so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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