yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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