It's like God shit irony all over that family
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Panties = found
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
Randomize
