she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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