Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize