I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I am naked and annoyed.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Randomize
