Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize
