we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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