I love having hate sex.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
