Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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